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| Zombie slayer Ben Zeller prepares for battle. |
The key to surviving a
zombie apocalypse: “having slow friends,” said Scott Bingham, a veteran zombie
slayer. "You don’t have to outrun the zombie, you just have to outrun your
friends."
That's one way to do it. But with zombie numbers on the rise across Utah State University’s campus, this week, humans are perfecting many more tactics to keep their brains where they belong.
Many of the best zombie slayers are in top physical condition.
“Zombies get the heavy set first,” said James Powell, author of “Math and the Life-Impaired: How Disease Theory Predicts the Zombie Apocalypse,” published in 2012. “People need to do more cardiovascular.”
But sometimes, no amount of running away will do. For those who must stand and fight, Zombie-slaying technologies have been developed for combating the outbreak.
Scientists are hotly debating the question of why some common human objects have such a significant toxic effect on zombies, for whom rolled up socks and Nerf projectiles can cause a state of paralysis for 15 minutes.
But human members of the resistance have little time to question why it works. They're simply happy it does.
As a former human, Jesse Victors became familiar with many of the weapons that have now been turned against him. “Firepower is really important, as far as Nerf guns and socks go,” he said.
Across campus, many humans have taken to crafting makeshift bandoliers, loaded with Nerf bullets and sock bombs.
Applying his research on insect trapping, Powell thinks new zombie-trapping technology should be created.
Powell also hypothesized that a moat would be an advantageous zombie-slaying tool.
“The corpses would get soupy in the water and then the fish would nibble on them,” he said, noting that human skin is more resilient than that of the undead.
Many humans can be seen seeking refuge in buildings on USU’s campus. “Usually we travel in groups,” said Nick Bills, a rookie zombie slayer. “Avoid big streets and building hop.”
Zombies have a different take on the best technique to survive: “There isn’t one,” said Rebecca Nielson, a flesh-starved zombie. “You’ll die.”
That's one way to do it. But with zombie numbers on the rise across Utah State University’s campus, this week, humans are perfecting many more tactics to keep their brains where they belong.
Many of the best zombie slayers are in top physical condition.
“Zombies get the heavy set first,” said James Powell, author of “Math and the Life-Impaired: How Disease Theory Predicts the Zombie Apocalypse,” published in 2012. “People need to do more cardiovascular.”
But sometimes, no amount of running away will do. For those who must stand and fight, Zombie-slaying technologies have been developed for combating the outbreak.
Scientists are hotly debating the question of why some common human objects have such a significant toxic effect on zombies, for whom rolled up socks and Nerf projectiles can cause a state of paralysis for 15 minutes.
But human members of the resistance have little time to question why it works. They're simply happy it does.
As a former human, Jesse Victors became familiar with many of the weapons that have now been turned against him. “Firepower is really important, as far as Nerf guns and socks go,” he said.
Across campus, many humans have taken to crafting makeshift bandoliers, loaded with Nerf bullets and sock bombs.
Applying his research on insect trapping, Powell thinks new zombie-trapping technology should be created.
Powell also hypothesized that a moat would be an advantageous zombie-slaying tool.
“The corpses would get soupy in the water and then the fish would nibble on them,” he said, noting that human skin is more resilient than that of the undead.
Many humans can be seen seeking refuge in buildings on USU’s campus. “Usually we travel in groups,” said Nick Bills, a rookie zombie slayer. “Avoid big streets and building hop.”
Zombies have a different take on the best technique to survive: “There isn’t one,” said Rebecca Nielson, a flesh-starved zombie. “You’ll die.”
UnDeadline reporters Tasia Briggs, Madison Stone,
Chase Christensen, Rachel Lewis and Kelsie Davis contributed to this report.
